Talk:Squidward's Suicide/@comment-26054278-20150228223236
Not too long ago, I did a very in-depth review of Slimebeast's story, "Lost Episodes". I had tons to talk about there, and I have just as much, if not more, to say about this cliche-ridden waste of time. Firstly, I have to comment on the grammar. The grammar in this story is very poor. There are countless tense swaps, and some sentences that are worded poorly/don't really make sense. This pasta does not work on an English level, so how does this story work as a plot- CLICHES. So many CLICHES. Jesus Christ, they pulled everyone out of the book for this story. The only one they didn't bother adding in was the use of 666 somewhere. I know this was one of the earlier stories to use these cliches, but it doesn't matter because the cliches were not scary then. If they weren't scary then, they sure as hell are not scary now. Also (and I have stated this before), the term "hyper-realistic" is used incorrectly. Yes, one of the biggest cliches of the Lost Episode/Video Game genre is not even right. "Hyper-realistic" refers to sculpture or painting. The correct term, "photo-realistic", is the one that should be used. This once again proves that the author doesn't know English as well as he probably could. Anyway, Lost Episodes will always resort to shock value. The only good ones that exist actually ignore this shock value and try and build up some real scares. Therefore, what does this pasta do? Of course it does shock value. As a matter of fact, it results to one of the laziest and most terrible things you can do with it: Include gore and children. Gore is just about the laziest thing an author can put it in to try to shock the audience. However, when the author includes children into that, it actually gets offensive. Children are a very sensitive subject, but if a story is written well or the plot heavily revolves around it to deliver a twist or something, yeah, it might be a tiny bit unconformable, but the story's quality will strive, or the shock will actually not be used too much to offend the audience (Autopilot is a good example). This pasta just randomly puts not just gore, but children into it just for the purpose of trying to shock the audience. However, this actually offended me, how they would throw around this very serious thing just to get some sort of reaction out of the reader. The author of this story needs to deal with serious subjects with respect, and there is none here. Also, they describe the gory children three times. Three. Times. People will say, "But it was important to the plot! You said that if it was important to the plot, it would work!" However, I will argue that for one, this story uses way too much of the gore and children (in fact, they use it three times) to not be able to offend the audience. Also, the whole "mystery" behind who killed the children really doesn't need to be here, and it could have been handled so much better. However, even the parts of the story without the cliches still leave so much room open for plotholes. I have actually said in another little thing I did related to this pasta, "A rather unbelievable plot, but mainly because it relies on Creepypasta logic ('I have no reason to continue, but I'm going to do it anyway'), which is kind of necessary for a lot of pastas. However, the reason here for why is very weak compared to the content we see." Let me elaborate a bit. The main character and everybody in the room sees a photo of a dead child (actually, ''three ''photos). After the first photo, they say, "We were of course mortified, but pressed on, hoping that it was just a sick joke." The author is talking about a dead, gruesomely murdered child, and they think it might just be a little morbid joke. These people are terrible. Once you start seeing ''dead children ''in a cartoon intended for a very young audience, why the hell would you keep going? Why would you not call the police immediately (they eventually do, but why didn't they do it right then)? Why are all these people still in the room? How did these interns even get in the room? Shouldn't they be, I don't know, doing actual work? There are so many plot holes, so many things that don't add up, that it completely destroys this story. The only possible "okay" thing in this story is the opening up until they start talking about how there was "something that set the whole creative team" back is decent, and there really isn't many grammar errors (there is one or two sentences that are worded a bit oddly, but they still make some sense). Also, the video is not very scary, and really has nothing to do with the quality of the story. As a matter of fact, I got bored after about 45 seconds of it. In total, this is not only one of the worst pastas on this wiki, but this is one of the most offensive things I have ever read, along with Cry Baby Lane. I give this 1.5/10, and nothing anybody says will get that rating any higher. Squidward's Suicide Riff : Check out Dorkpool's riff of this story. His comments make the story much more tolerable to sit through.